Inner Child Healing With EFT
This pattern set for healing the child
within uses EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique. If you are
unfamiliar with EFT, you can find a free protocol on
http://123EFT.com to get you
started.
Inner Child Healing: Profound Self Healing - For YOU
From Silvia Hartmann:
In this edition, we have but a single article to make sure it will get due
notice and attention.
Regardless of what your involvement may be in personal development, healing,
learning etc., I would strongly encourage you to read this article and read it
to the end, and most importantly, not to pre-judge the contents for it's
terminology or in terms of modality.
This is actually a Sidereus Energy Healing pattern which I have translated
across into the EFT modality to make it easy to use, easy to understand, and
easy to do with self or with clients.
It is globally useful, stable and ecological and I would offer it to you with
the hope that you will not only read it, but use it.
Inner Child Healing:
EFT & Inner Child Work
About a week ago, a young man by the name of Paul killed himself with a heroin
overdose. He was 24 years old, very intelligent, very talented.
Following his death, someone said, "I feel so guilty about this. I knew him for
five years and I feel responsible. I could have done more to help him."
I said, "Get in line. Have you seen Murder On The Orient Express? I was there
too, and so were at least a dozen other people. But before he ever got there,
what about all the other people involved during the time of his life? His mother
who left him, the various foster homes, the children's homes, all the teachers
and social workers involved who "processed" him in that time, the drug dealers,
his friends, his relatives - well, as I said, get in line. It's a very, very
long line, and at the end of the day, by the time we knew him the damage had
been done. By the time he was six years old, it was near enough all over."
This set me to thinking.
About the fact that a single sentence placed to a young child can do and undo
more than 30 years spend in therapy for an adult.
And about the fact that the parts of us that remember what it was like to "be
that child" live still in quantum space, and, it being a *quantum space* that we
can make changes now that will re-write history then.
The November Man
Milton Erickson, the famous hypnotherapist, once had a very special client. This
was a man who had been kept by his lunatic religious fanatic parents in a dark
cellar his entire life and was only found upon their death. He had no
understanding of the world and no social skills of any kind. Over a period of
time, Milton Erickson would age regress him and appear to him as the November
Man, a person who would take him out of the cellar and have him experience a
playground, a family dinner, a walk to the shops, a holiday by the sea, so that
the man would have "childhood memories" that would become templates to base his
current behaviour on.
There is much literature on "Inner Child" work, and for all of you who dismiss
this idea as some kind of lame new age fascination, please read on. It is my
supposition that this is the most important type of personal development and
HEALING work you could ever undertake - if you have the courage.
Inner Child Work & EFT
I am going to suggest some approaches to begin your own Inner Child Healing explorations,
using Gary Craig's Emotional Freedom Techniques. If you do not know how to use
EFT, you can find a full protocol here and I would suggest you try this out on
some other emotional issues first before returning to this article.
Pre-Work
In many cases, before we can even begin to start, some pre-work needs to be
done. It is the sad truth that many deep underlying beliefs we now have as
adults about how children should be treated have been formed by the way WE were
treated. Oh, indeed, we make decisions to "do much better than that" and many of
us do when we are dealing with *other* children or our own; however, how we deal
with *ourselves* remains often very much just like our caretakers did.
So, we might begin with asking some very basic questions about your feelings
regarding "children" in total.
· How do you feel about children?
· Do you like them?
· Do you find them annoying, irritating, attention seeking, limiting to your own
endeavours?
· Do you like *some kinds of children* better than others? If so, why?
· What *kind* of children do you find particularly annoying? What age, type,
gender, race, upbringing, looks?
· How do you feel about an adult's responsibility for the upbringing of
children?
· Do you have any particularly strong views about what should or should not be
done with, to or by children?
The questions above will begin to make you aware of some emotions and memories
regarding children in general, including the recoil decision "not to go there at
all" or "not being interested in children", for example.
If you are involved in personal development, either with clients or for your own
healing and growth, and most likely, both, then "children" and their issues
should really be of prime concern to you - naturally.
I don't have to tell you that most every long lasting problem or limitation now
is rooted in some way in childhood experiences or the lack thereof, you already
know this on every level.
So *should there be a resistance* to even looking into these kinds of issues, I
would seriously ask you to have a tap on this very resistance - it could well
contain a breakthrough key to your current problems.
Now, let's move on to working with your own past selves, the children that you
once were.
Proxy Tapping Past Selves
The mechanism of proxy tapping is particularly useful in the context of IC
healing approaches because it has a TRIPLE effect:
· Firstly, it clears the issue in question very successfully from the more
resourceful, older position that you are now;
· Secondly, it creates a sense of *connection* and of *responsibility* for the
past self - it is a form of *re-parenting* yourself.
· Thirdly, proxy tapping the past self both heals those old wounds and at the
same time, changes the entire system that is your self esteem, self concept or
whatever you want to call it, NOW as the changes ripple through the whole that
is you, creating new templates of behaviour, thought and possibility as this
happens.
If you need basic instructions on the EFT Proxy Protocol, you can find it on
http://starfields.org/Relationships/proxy.htm
Healing Through Time
I will make some suggestions now on possible areas where you might like to apply
EFT, through time.
Conception & Pregnancy. Consider the baby that was conceived and that would grow
up to become you. What were the circumstances of this? Is there anything that
comes to mind for this time period, any sense, any emotions, any words or
statements you were told about that have stayed with you and still cause
discomfort?
Example Opening Statements (please note the slight modifications in the
statements):
· Even though this baby should never have been born, I now deeply and profoundly
love and welcome this baby.
· Even though this baby was unwanted, I now deeply and profoundly love, accept
and welcome this baby.
· Even though this baby's mother drank all through pregnancy, I now deeply and
profoundly love and welcome this baby.
· Even though it was said that this baby was born under an unlucky star, I now
deeply and profoundly love and welcome this baby.
You might like to do another round, after such statements have been completed,
but use the generic set up statement of:
"I now deeply and completely HEAL this baby."
*Comment - If these Opening Statements cause you much distress, it might be best
to do this process with another to help guide and support you.
Birth. Birth is always a very dramatic experience. You might remember something,
you might have a feeling or sense of something that happened then, and many of
us have been told many horrific things about this time, all of which is stored
on some level in our multiordinate energy matrices.
Here are some example opening statements:
· Even though this baby caused his/her mother so much pain and suffering, I now
deeply and profoundly forgive and love this baby.
· Even though this baby was born too early, I now deeply and profoundly love and
accept this baby.
· Even though this baby nearly died, I now deeply and profoundly love and accept
this baby.
Following the birth statements, I would advise to always append each round with
a round of:
I now deeply and profoundly heal this baby from all wounds he/she might have
sustained at the time of birth.
0-6 Months. This is a critical stage in the life of a child, as it makes its
first experiences with The Hard. Constant caretaking, attention, love, warmth,
feeding is of the essence for this child to grow up strong and confident. There
are those who say that the very most basic ideas and concepts, way below the
threshold of conscious awareness or of words and pictures, are formed in that
time.
Example Opening Statements:
· Even though this baby never received enough love, I now deeply and profoundly
love this baby.
· Even though this baby was left alone in the dark, I now deeply and profoundly
love and embrace this baby.
· Even though this baby was so helpless, I now deeply and profoundly love and
accept responsibility for this baby.
· Even though this baby was always screaming, I now deeply and profoundly love
and nourish this baby.
I would advise to append each round with the following:
I now deeply and profoundly heal this baby from the wounds he/she has sustained
at that fragile time.
6 Months - 2 Years. Entirely reliant on the caretakers, the child now begins
their own explorations of the World. Their experiences during this time - and
this includes toilet training - are said to set their energy exchanges with the
All There Is on a most profound level. This includes basic beliefs of what can
and cannot be had, what can and cannot be done, what can and cannot be learned,
as well as how, what and why relationships are constructed, mostly based on the
primary caretakers of that time.
Example opening statements might include:
· Even though this child was not allowed to explore, I now deeply and profoundly
love and encourage this child.
· Even though this child was ignored, I now deeply and profoundly acknowledge
and love this child.
· Even though this child was totally overwhelmed by the world, I now deeply and
profoundly love and take responsibility for this child.
· Even though this child was pushed on way too fast, I now deeply and profoundly
love and accept this child.
Append as usual, any one given round with a round of:
I now heal this child, deeply and profoundly, from all the injuries it sustained
during this time of life.
2 Years - 6 Years. This is the time of development of the basic sense of self -
who we are, what our place is in the world. Many very unhelpful self concepts
are formed during this time, which may include first contacts with organised
learning which are of the essence for undertaking a great many tasks that rely
on learning and change in the future.
Example opening statements might include:
· Even though this child was a girl, I now deeply and profoundly love and accept
this child.
· Even though this child was slow to learn, I now deeply and profoundly love and
accept this child.
· Even though this child was said to have been "a little monster", I now deeply
and profoundly love and accept this child.
· Even though this child was abused, I now deeply and profoundly love and
treasure this child.
· Even though this child was different, I now deeply and profoundly love and
treasure this child.
As always, append each round with the global:
I now heal all the injuries this child sustained during this time, deeply and
profoundly, with my love.
And Onward To Maturity
Of course, change and learning do not stop when we are 6 years old. It would be
most valuable indeed to continue on and create your own custom made line of
growth beyond age 6 and into pre-teen, then teenager stage and until you have
reached a point of conclusion where you felt maturity and adult hood had been
obtained.
Now the truth is that many of us, age 40, 50, 60 and beyond have never really
felt as though they did attain adulthood; many of us have a horror of such a
state and actively fight it for many reasons, the main one being that those who
were presented to us as models of adulthood were not what we would ever want to
become.
However, it is my supposition that IC explorations, and more specifically, IC
Healing can help accomplish this.
By taking responsibility in a true adult fashion - note, a true adult fashion
not as was modelled by the so called "Grown Ups" around us - for our own selves,
we are both healing past wounds as well as *recreating a whole new model* of
adulthood for our own past selves.
This is a most profoundly healing and ecological set of energy exchanges *within
our own self* that I absolutely believe needs to be accomplished FIRST and as
the FIRST PRIORITY to any other endeavour.
For how can you heal others if you cannot heal yourself, how can you forgive
others if you cannot forgive yourself, how can you serve others if you cannot
serve yourself?
It is often said that "loving the self" precedes all endeavours to love others.
Loving the child you once were is an essential, if not *the only essential*
component to understanding the nature of love, forgiveness and healing. I offer
you these protocols for use with your self and your clients with my sincere
wishes to you for deep healing and re-alignment.
Silvia Hartmann
http://SilviaHartmann.com
Author, Adventures In EFT,
Advanced Patterns Of EFT
First Published In the StarFields Intelligence ezine February 3rd, 2002
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